big boy.

Ben had a pediatrician appointment yesterday. He got two shots - and was not very happy about it. He's also 25.7 pounds and 33 inches tall. Mister Ben, such a big boy. Below, he poses for the camera.

ben is 11 months old today!

Crazy. I realized a little while ago that today's the 23rd, and he's 11 months old!

Here are some goony pictures of him for you.

this one's for aunt lauren

Aunt Lauren bought Ben this shirt when he was first born... It's a shirt from the restaurant we went to for brunch when I visited her in San Diego. It's sort of a joke between us, this place, because I was so hungry that while we were waiting in line to be seated (a long line, if I remember correctly) I almost collapsed. I had to sit down, I broke out in a sweat, and I was unable to speak for a couple of seconds. The nice hostess got me a glass of orange juice and I felt better after that. After we were finally seated, we had a good laugh about it. I felt like an idiot.


Anyway, I can't believe Ben is big enough to wear this shirt! I remember when we got it in the mail I hung it in his closet, figuring that it'd be years, literally, before it would fit. Thanks, Aunt Lauren!

if you're happy and you know it...

Ben clapped his hands today!

I've been nagging him for months about it. Usually he humors me and pays attention while I clap and sing to him. Then he looks away like, 'ugh. leave me alone.'

I don't have any pictures... I'm working on it.

give me back my son!

Years ago, someone I know did a great impression of Mel Gibson yelling, "give me back my son!" from the movie Ransom. We're talking practicing in front of the mirror and stuff. You know who you are.


That's how I feel right now about Ben. I look at him and ask, 'who are you and what have you done with Ben?'

I don't know what it is, but for the past 4 nights he's been up multiple times, standing in his crib and crying. He's not taking the naps he's supposed to. He's generally cranky.

I had trouble like this awhile back with him, and I found a site which explained things in layman's terms.

Your baby is also going through enormous developmental spurts that you can't see, because they're dealing with cognitive processes. They work through these spurts the same way they work through the physical spurts, but when your baby is practicing recognizing patterns, you can't see that. Leading up to the actual new skill the baby is going to go through several weeks of intense brain work and prep that you can't necessarily see (unless you know specifically what to look for). One of the side effects of this brain work is that they don't sleep as well as they do during times in which they're not about to master a new skill. They may seem restless in the night (like they do sometimes when mastering a physical skill) but it's just nothing you can see and label. So we call it a sleep regression.

Once a baby has learned the new skill, s/he will often sleep through the entire night for 1-3 nights after mastering the skill. Which is freaky from the parents' perspective, because you go from waking 10 times one night to sleeping 12 hours the next. But it makes complete sense if you know that the baby was working on this really tough challenge and couldn't help but wake up so often (in fact it's probably a miracle that the baby could even fall asleep in the first place with so much going on in the noggin), and then once they've got it they relax and sleep it off for a couple of days, like sleeping off a crazy party. Then they'll most likely go back to sleeping the way they were before they started working on the new developmental skill.

I cant feel any new teeth or anything, but I'm guessing it's some sort of sleep regression - something he's working on (walking? standing up? doing his times tables? who knows?). This explanation makes sense to me, and makes me feel better - if for no other reason than that it gives me some hope that things will go back to 'normal.'

don't fence me in.

I ordered two baby gates off of Amazon today. Ben's officially mobile. He crawls so much now, and so quickly, that this morning I moved our coffee table into the dining room to give him some space in the living room. As an aside, I really need to clean our floors because the child's dirty knees and feet make him look like a street urchin. Sigh.

He's really interested in our low bookshelves, and our entertainment center, so this is my temporary solution:
The mats are those interlocking foam ones, so they're light and easily movable (by Ben, too) - but for the most part he's easily distractable and almost seems to understand when I tell him 'no.' I'm probably just kidding myself, I know.

I took some pictures this morning while Ben was playing with his activity table (the toy you see nearly every single post here). I put the legs on and he started pulling himself up. Here are the stages:

new ride.

I turned into That Parent today. Capital T, capital P. I don't know how it happened, or what came over me, but I became her.

(Allow me to reminisce for just a second, if you would. After all, I do hope to print these blog entries out for Ben one day, so I thought I'd write these memories down before I forget them. I promise I'll come full circle in the end.)

Chris' mom and my sisters-in-law threw me a baby shower on 8/26/06, a Saturday. What none of us could have known beforehand was that Ben was going to come on 8/23/06 - 7 weeks ahead of his due date.

I was discharged from the hospital 8/25, and was so sad, because Ben couldn't come home with us. I remember feeling guilty leaving the hospital without him. It was, without question , one of the hardest things I've ever had to do, and I told many people that it wasn't something I'd ever wish on anyone.

We decided to go ahead with the shower, because so much planning had gone into it, and especially because everyone knew how much I needed to get my mind off of everything. I remember being so thankful that things had a way of working out this way.

I remember pulling up to the house, and crying, because I saw this scene:

"it's a boy!" balloons on the front porch:


... and the cutest idea ever - a clothesline filled with onesies, bibs, burp cloths and socks... most of them preemie-sized. For Ben!


I can't really explain why I cried so hard (yes, I was weepy from hormones), except to say that I couldn't wait to get him home and put those clothes on him and hold him and get to know him. We had hoped for a son, and he was this close - but not yet ready to come home. My heart was literally hurting. And I was so thankful for all of these things for him. Just the night before we'd been at the hospital, where I was able to hold Benjamin for the first time. He was so small:


So, it was nice to have everyone around me at the shower, wishing us well and promising prayers for Benjamin. They were all patient with me and my puffy and sleep-deprived self, walking around slowly. Aunt Margie and Ashley took pictures while I opened gifts. I remember hoping that I didn't seem completely out of it. We were so appreciative for everything. Here, I cut the cake that reads, "Good Grief, Another Reif!"


And here I am opening a special book for Benjamin - and wearing the special NICU bracelet that Chris and I (and Ben) would wear for the next three weeks:


After all was said and done, it was a great day and I loved seeing everybody. I was overwhelmed and incredibly thankful. I remember sitting back and looking around and being grateful that all of those people - and countless others from my side of the family, and our friends - already loved Benjamin. It was a pretty cool feeling. Calming.

Benjamin has had this one toy in particular - given to him by the Hetheringtons - boxed up in the basement since I received it at his baby shower. He just became big enough to use it, and this is where my reminiscing comes full circle.


Do you see that cutie in the picture above? How can you not love him? How can I walk down the street pushing him in his little car, without beaming with pride? He's our son! And he's 10 months old! And 24 pounds! Look at him! And I know you think he's great, but guess what? His dad and I know how great he is.

So when I say I became That Parent today, I mean it. I made eye contact with people (normally I'm shy-ish), and smiled, and waited for them to tell me how cute he is. Everybody did, by the way. He made everyone smile. He even made friends with two old Italian guys who hold court in front of one of the houses down the street. And believe me when I tell you that they're usually a tough crowd.

This kid is fun to be with, and I'm just bursting with pride.

But enough about me. Thanks for listening to my diatribe.

Ben had fun, too. To prove it, here are some more pictures.

outer banks

We were in the Outer Banks this past weekend with our friends Jeff and Danielle, their daughter Cambelle, and Danielle's family. It was great! Ben got his first taste of the beach... and of sand.


Ben also got to play with Cambelle, though for the first few days he was in no mood to play with anybody. He had a little bit of a fever and wasn't really himself. Here they are, on our last full day, getting used to each other:


Soon enough, though, Cambelle was trying to teach him how to stand up. He's not all that good at it yet - his legs are pretty wobbly, and he does have cankles... He watches her and tries it out (a little unsuccessfully).


Ben's first 'trick' that we're working on... asking him, "How big is Benjamin?"

SO BIG!!! Granted, he'll occasionally throw his arms up without being prompted, and then we clap and tell him how big he is and then he gets all excited. He's a cutie.

And here Chris is with Ben, on our last night there. My boys!

technical difficulties

So, Ben is crawling! How far he crawls depends on how much energy he has... It's been so fun to watch him. I have taken several videos of him crawling, but I can't seem to get them uploaded to YouTube at the moment. Instead, I'll give you a couple of pictures from the other day.

Below, Ben in his I'm-not-yet-awake state, stares out the window.


'Okay, mom, enough of this picture-taking. You can let me out now.'


And below, Ben and Soph.